Urban Decay
by Snape is Philosophy
Summary: Sesame Street was once a paradise. Now it was a war zone.
1. Chapter 1

Bert's heart sank as the telephone rang. It could just be another debt collector, calling for the umpteenth time. But being as he lived on Sesame Street, their were also far more sinister explanations. Ernie went to get groceries, but he wasn't back yet...

_He should have returned by now._

Bert, his hand shaking so wildly that he feared he would be unable to hold the receiver. "Hello?" he forced out, a mere cough.

"Bert?" It was undoubtedly Ernie on the other end, "I've just finished buying groceries."

Bert sighed. "I'm thrilled to hear that your alive!"

Ernie realized it was good that he called when he did. "I'll back as soon as possible."

"Okay, but be sure it's before six." Bert hung up the phone and looked at the clock. It was five thirty-eight. After six in the evening, neither the NYPD nor emergency services would not enter Sesame Street until ten, declaring it was to dangerous between these four hours. And it _was_ dangerous, as those were the hours the murders occurred. When their weren't murders their were armed mercenaries patrolling the street.

It was hard to believe had once been an almost ideal street.

Bert could recall when he first when he had first come to Sesame Street. He had been working as a bellhop for a immoral and excessive resort in Connecticut dominated by appallingly shallow, materialistic, ungrateful and hateful customers. Bert's brother Bart, dismayed by both the coldness of the place and his sibling's deteriorating emotional state, convinced Bert to take a drive to New York City to seek a better life.

At first the trip had been a disaster. The smog and noise alienated Bert, who almost began regretting the trip. Bart said they were out of gas, so they stopped at a gas station on Sesame Street. By the end of the day, Bert had decided to purchase an apartment in the area. He eventually agreed to be roommates with Ernie, despite a bad first impression (he warmed up to him later on).

Bert had loved everything about Sesame Street: the safe and clean environment, the educational culture, ethical businesses, his loving neighbors (even Oscar wasn't that bad). He remembered the street won best in New York so many times they cancelled the award for fairness reasons.

What changed?

Looking back, Bert supposed an early sign of what was to come was Roosevelt Franklin's mysterious appearance in the subway tunnels in 1996. Literally, one moment he was seen entering the restroom and he was never seen again. No one ever could explain what had happened to him, and nobody could say for sure if he was gone or not. The incident shocked the street, but no further incidents developed. After a respectable period of mourning, Sesame Street resumed.

Two years after Roosevelt vanished, Elmo began his own television program called Elmo's World. Bert had appeared on the program a few times himself. Bert admired Elmo for taking on such a vast project, but noticed some small yet disconcerting sign of...well, the Muppet's sanity. At first Bert thought he was unfair to think this when clearly Elmo was merely stressed from the pressure of his show.

Then, one night in 2002, Bert was taking out the garbage. He had irritated as he walked out in the chilly dark been because for _some reason_ he couldn't understand, Ernie had flooded the bathtub that morning. Bert had to pay two hundred dollars to fix it, meaning he couldn't afford that brand new set of paperclips for another month. This was on his mind as he put the garbage bag in the trash can, then witnessed a strange sight as he turned slightly.

It was Elmo, rolling in a pile of mud, with a demented look on his face. He was muttering strange things like "craven wave of death," and "New World Order" while grunting. Bert, astonished and having completely forgot his earlier troubles, asked what he was doing. Elmo's facial expression immediately was much saner, as if the Muppet had forgotten what had just taken place, as he cheerfully told Bert he needed to go to the pet store.

Bert told of the incident only to Ernie, who had not believed him. Bert decided to keep the events to himself after that, but was much more cautious whenever Elmo was around.

In 2006, Abby Cadabby came to Sesame Street, and life was pure chaos and misery ever since. Oh, sure she had feigned kindness the first few weeks, mostly to take advantage of the street's welcoming nature. But once she has settled in, she began to show her true colors.

Abby began almost overnight terrorizing the town, harassing citizens with her witchcraft and setting draconian standards. It wasn't long before she was the petty dictator of the street. Bert could recall exactly when the armed guards began patrolling the street at night, but he believed it had been sometime in 2008. No names, no explanation, no information or token reasoning of any kind.

Only Oscar had refused to recognize their authority. The Grouch refused to pay them when ordered, and routinely called them names. In retrospect, it had only been a matter of time before they responded.

It had been a very nice burial, as Ernie had later commented. The eulogy had been well-written, though Bert felt that Slimey looked like he was on a mental breakdown. Everybody on the street had come to pay their respects, and not a dry eye was present when the casket was carried out of the room; with the exception of Abby, who looked bored, and caused a spark of rage within Bert when she checked her watch.

Now, at least one murder happened every night between six and ten. His Aunt Matilda and Bart had been begging him to leave Sesame Street. Bart even went far enough as to suggest that awful Connecticut resort would be better. But Bert couldn't just leave his old friends. Bert couldn't just give up on Sesame Street, because he knew it could be great. Why, it _had_ been great not that long ago.

Although, his friends had been very distant lately. They always seemed afraid of him whenever they crossed paths...

How long had he just sat reflecting on the misery? The clock said four minutes to six. Ernie needed to get back in four minutes. Bert looked over at his copy of George Orwell's 1984 and realized he was in his own Oceania. Was it possible to save this city, or was staying alive the maximum?

Bert jumped when he heard gunfire. His heart sank with horror as he realized that the gunfire was from downstairs inside his building, which had never happened before. Bert heard frantic footsteps, which he assumed were gunmen fleeing. Though a risky move, Bert exited the apartment and quietly walked down the stars to see if it was Ernie they shot. It wasn't, but the sight before him broke his heart anyway.

Cookie Monster was on the floor.


	2. Chapter 2

Six minutes had gone by since Bert had carried a bloody Cookie Monster up to his apartment. Bert had stopped most of the bleeding with a rag, but the muppet still was clearly in dire need of hospitalization.

"Bert?" Cookie Monster called out weakly.

"Yes?"

"Water."

Bert raced to the kitchen a poured a glass of water, then carefully handed it to his blue compatriot.

"Thank you," he said appreciatively, "Bert not evil."

_Not evil? What an odd comment,_ Bert thought to himself. Perhaps Cookie Monster was still in shock. "Cookie Monster, we need to get you to a hospital."

Cookie Monster looked at Bert as if he had lost his mind. "The guards?"

"We can sneak out the back door without being seen," Bert said in a confident tone, although his heart was pounding wildly. He wasn't entirely sure if they would check that side of the building or not.

Cookie Monster looked skeptical, but nodded in agreement anyway. They had no other options.

Bert picked up Cookie Monster as gently as possible and exited his apartment. The first step Bert put his foot on made a loud, sharp squeaking noise that caused him to jump, nearly dropping Cookie Monster. Why did these stairs always have to be louder when you walked down them then walking up?

After what seemed like several hours (although it was likely only a few minutes) they reached the end of the stairway. Bert quietly moved toward the door and looked out a small window. He saw nobody outside, but there was plenty of room to hide.

"Be very quiet," Bert whispered to Cookie Monster, who blinked that he understood.

Bert's hands shook as he creaked open the door slowly, hoping that nobody would jump out and attack.

Nobody was there. Bert inwardly sighed in relief and carefully walked through the dark alley until he realized that he was safe enough to make a phone call.

* * *

Telly sighed as he cut his peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwiches into triangle shapes. He caught a glimpse of the guards on the street from the side of his eye. He didn't dare look directly at them; that was known to be an automatic ticket to death.

He wished things could go back to how they were before this nightmare began. He still didn't understand how this could have happened.

Telly grabbed his sandwiches and quietly ate at a small table away from the window. He nearly fell out of his chair when he heard a loud gunshot that seemed to come from inside the building. The guards had never shot anyone indoors before.

After a few moments, Telly heard a creaking noise on the staircase. Terrified, Telly walked to the peephole of his apartment to see who was there. It was Bert, carrying Cookie Monster up the stairs. Cookie Monster had clearly been shot.

Was Bert helping Cookie Monster? Or was Bert the shooter?

_Everyone_ knew the rumors about Bert. Telly at first found them laughable - Bert was one of the least malicious people he knew. But as time went on, and the death toll rose, he couldn't help but wonder.

Telly hoped they were just baseless rumors. Because otherwise Cookie Monster was in danger.


End file.
